We have to face the truth of this political moment. Everyone—seriously, everyone—in high office today, or trying to occupy a high office, is a Russian plant.
Representative Tulsi Gabbard (D-Hawaii) is a Russian asset. Hillary Clinton, who knows a thing or two about Russian assets, said so in no uncertain terms while being interviewed by David Plouffe on his podcast. Wanting to run as a third-party candidate is clear evidence, if not definitive proof, of her Russian asset-ness. That Gabbard insists she has no such plans or ties is irrelevant
Jill Stein (who, sadly, doesn’t seem to be running this time) is also a Russian agent of influence. We can take Hillary’s word for it, because if anyone is an expert on Russian agents of influence, it’s Hillary. Having deprived Hillary of a much-deserved victory in 2016, Stein is the very definition of a Putin woman.
Joe Biden is a Russian asset. Joe Biden, Hunter Biden, and Devon Archer were spotted playing golf in 2014 while Hunter Biden was a board member of Burisma Holdings—the Ukrainian Russia-connected company linked directly to a pro-Putin Ukrainian oligarch, Victor Medvedchuk, whose daughter is Putin’s goddaughter. Hunter Biden is clearly a Russian asset who got paid by Burisma $83,000 a month for evidently doing nothing.
Archer, a former aide to John Kerry, Obama’s one-time secretary of state, got the same shady (and lucrative) deal from Burisma. This money trail leads to John Kerry—a well-known frontman for Iranian (and, by extension, Russian) interests.
It is no longer disputed that Biden’s family has financial interests aligned with Putin and his Numero Uno man in Ukraine. The former vice president’s risible claim that he had no involvement in his son’s business dealings is contradicted by Hunter Biden himself—which means that the money trail leads directly from Putin to Barack Obama’s vice president.
Obama himself is implicated in pro-Russian dealings. Obama could not have been unaware that his own vice president’s family is getting paid by Putin—which surely explains why he refused, time and again, Ukraine’s pleas for military hardware. Obama, as befits a highly placed Putin asset, was doing Putin’s bidding in Eastern Europe.
Bernie Sanders is a Russian asset. Bernie has spent his entire life peddling pro-Russian politics and policies. If it were anyone else, we could surmise that Bernie was recruited by the KGB in the late 1980s, while on his honeymoon in the USSR. But in Bernie’s case, he was surely a KGB asset long before that—Bernie didn’t need to be recruited, he volunteered.
Former President Bill Clinton is a Putin asset. Bill Clinton was spotted in Moscow getting a cool half-million bucks from Putin for a quickie pretend-speech about which nobody cared and to which no one paid attention. If Putin’s tentacles can reach that high into the Democratic Party—Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Bill Clinton, John Kerry—is there anyone left out there who isn’t a Putin asset?
President Trump is a Russian asset, according to both Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton—and with both of them in agreement on this, Trump doesn’t stand a chance of ever being elected to anything. Since his victory over Hillary cannot be explained by anything other than “Russia, Russia, Russia,” and since Trump has been a Russian asset since the 1980s (says Jonathan Chait), the entire Republican Party is one big Russian asset.
Robert Mueller spent $34 million and 400 pages explaining how Trump and his campaign had nothing to do with Russia, which only makes sense if one assumes that Mueller himself is a Russian plant. No doubt, everyone on the Mueller crew was cashing Russian paychecks, as they chortled writing the “no collusion” Mueller report.
It was even rumored that Robert Mueller himself might possibly have been aware of some of the things the Mueller report said, though his subsequent congressional testimony revealed that he knew virtually nothing of what was in it, and could barely remember his own name.
Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell is a Russian asset. McConnell was just plain old Cocaine Mitch at one time. But ever since the Kentucky Republican refused to bring a Democratic pork-and-“election security” bill to a vote in the Senate, Moscow Mitch revealed his Russian roots for all to see. Kentucky, after all, has always been a notorious breeding ground for Russian stooges.
There is only one public figure in America today who is not a Russian asset. There is only one public figure, beloved by millions, worshipped by the masses, adored by Americans of all stripes, who should be running for president today.
It is time for a Clinton-Trump re-match. The third time running for prez is surely the charm, for America’s sweetheart.
Except . . . Hillary, as secretary of state, signed off on selling a sizable chunk of America’s uranium production to Putin. This transaction is now known as the Uranium One scandal—one of a long, long list of Clinton scandals that came and went, while barely imprinting themselves on the public consciousness since there is always another Clinton scandal just around the corner.
Could it be . . . ? Is Hillary also a Putin plant?
Is there no one left in America who isn’t on Putin’s payroll?