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Books & Culture

The Swamp Goes to the World Series

The only thing the deep state likes more than an all controlling bureaucracy is the Washington Nationals with the Washington Capitals as the runner up.


- October 23rd, 2019
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Real sports fans take their teams with them. Even when they move to work for the federal government. 

Nothing brings Red Sox, Yankees, Mets, and Phillies fans together better than a bar full of sloppy K Street Nationals fans because no one is actually from D.C.—though too many do acclimate to this swampy place. Wander into a random bar near any overseas U.S. military base and I guarantee you will find Astros fans, Brewers fans, Braves fans sheepishly doing the tomahawk chop, and even White Sox and Reds fans. Because these are all real teams. 

But you will not find any Nats fans. Because the Nats fanbase is not real. It didn’t exist until a week ago. 

The swamp doesn’t stand a chance in defeating Donald Trump. Does it stand a chance in the World Series? Against a Texas powerhouse from Houston?

The only thing the deep state likes more than an all controlling bureaucracy is the Washington Nationals with the Washington Capitals as the runner up. 

Real baseball fans around the Beltway pull for the Baltimore Orioles. They liked Cal Ripken, Jr. They loved Mike Mussina before he defected to the Yankees. They shout “O!” at the right time when the National Anthem rings out at Camden Yards. Real baseball fans have real traditions, not some stupid “Baby Shark” meme that started last week.  

The fickle transient frontrunner class pull for the Washington Nationals, a baseball team from Montreal that the establishment just adores.

You’ll hear them say they’re “diehard fans” of the Nats. The only thing more ridiculous than that is when Obama declared himself “scandal free.” You cannot be a “diehard fan” of a team that has only existed in this century. Red Sox fans are true diehards. They had to wait for the Curse of the Bambino to lift before they could get a Series win. Chicago Cubs fans are the ultimate diehards. They waited 108 years—from 1908 to 2016—between World Series wins. 

The Nats? They came into existence in 2005. Some Nats’ so-called real fans say “We’ve followed them since RFK!” They moved out of RFK into their new stadium in 2008. Wow, they had to wait a whole three years for a brand new stadium! Please. The Boston Red Sox have been playing in Fenway since 1912.  

HuffPost’s Ryan Reilly caught the most honest Nats fan in the world right after they swept the Cardinals. 

Guy with a mic: “How long have you been a Nats fan for?” 

Fan: “Since today!”  

If that doesn’t sum up the Washington of team switchers like David Gergen, I don’t know what does. Meanwhile, there’s a little old lady in Cleveland who’s still waiting for the Indians to follow up their last World Series win, which was in 1948. God bless you Bob Feller. 

And some old codger in Dallas is still waiting for the Texas Rangers to get their act together and win the series at all.  

These are long-suffering fans. They have gone decades without a World Series victory. They pay for their ticket with their hard-earned money, they park their butts in the bleachers, they settle in with a beer and they end up thinking, decade after decade, “There’s always next year.” 

Nats “fans” have only had to say that 14 times. Give me a break.  

The Nats have an ersatz fan base, fitting for a city full of blowhard politicians and their gaslighting handlers and hangers on. The Nationals are a creation of the swamp, applauded only by the creatures in the swamp and the D.C. based fake news media that cover them.

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