A heretofore unknown oracle of strategic thinking, U.S. Representative Alexander Xavier Mooney, (R-W.Va.) whose previous reputation involved only his superlative fundraising, his position on the House Financial Services Committee, and the consumption of Chick-fil-A like a woodchipper in overdrive, has now more or less decided that war with Cuba is the way to go.
Could it be that Alejandro El Gordo is multitasking? Could it be that he has an alternative agenda? Let’s have a look at things from his perspective.
1) National headlines about using military force in Cuba get Mooney out from under the spotlight of the Office of Congressional Ethics, which is trying to determine how many appendages he had in the campaign finance cookie jar.
2) National headlines about using military force in Cuba will bring forth out-of-state donors for his 2022 campaign. Ka-ching!
3) Even if fellow Republicans tell him to shut up and melt back into the woodwork, Mooney can hold himself up to Cuban Americans as the largest thing since José Marti. (Well, sort of.) And ask for more campaign dollars. Ka-ching!
To understand the enormity of the lunacy he is proposing, let’s look at the ideas in the leaked documents that outline his “plan.”
1) “Ensure the delivery of humanitarian aid to the people of Cuba, including but not limited to food, water, and medicine.”
Really? Does Mooney think the Communist government in Havana is going to take anything from the counterrevolutionary Yanqui imperialists?
2) “Create a safe zone in Cuba for the Cuban people to safely receive humanitarian aid.”
Sure, Alex. It’s called Miami. Because if you think that the totalitarian Communist regime is going to let its citizens casually stroll in and out of a safe zone, it will be only after the U.S. invades, conquers, and occupies the whole island first. After 20 years of that sort of thing (now wasted by the Biden regime) in Afghanistan, how will you justify doing the same thing in Cuba?
3) “Prevent humanitarian aid from being stolen by the Cuban government and its forces.”
Right.
And the next thing Alex will hear from the DGI boys and the vile, lying propagandists of Radio Havana‘s “Voice of Cuba” is:
Alejandro Mooney, the grotesquely obese, misbegotten son of the counterrevolutionary and traitorous family Suarez, which abandoned our country for the evils of the Yanqui capitalists, now accuses the People’s government of theft, when he himself is accused of theft by his own government. This borracho who sleeps during the day now proposes war so that he can recover the vast landholdings of the Suarez family over the bodies of Yanqui Marines.
Meanwhile, according to The American Conservative, Mooney’s office says, “The congressman hasn’t introduced any legislation related to Cuba. If he does introduce legislation we’ll be happy to comment at that time. Our office doesn’t comment on hypothetical legislation.”
That kind of dishwater answer is likely the result of the recent hemorrhage of nearly a quarter of Mooney’s Washington staff, including his communications director, Lynn Hatcher. Thus, the random pachinko ball has fallen on the head of Hatcher’s former assistant, 23-year-old Garrett Huizenga, upon whom the job plopped only days ago.
Is it any wonder that Mooney was caught flat-footed when somebody leaked his resolution?
Meanwhile, the ethics committee plods along, looking through Mooney’s campaign finance ledgers. Watch this space.