Bill Weld Torches His Mind

Bill Weld is as much a constitutional scholar as I am a geneticist. His maddening cry for the execution of President Trump is no better than my non-informed diagnosis of Weld’s case of acute madness: that he has the WASP equivalent of Tay-Sachs disease, minus the covenantal nature of Judaism and the high intelligence of Ashkenazi Jews.

The product of centuries of inbreeding, the branches of Weld’s family tree are as gnarled and knotted as the arthritic hands of any ancestor named Isaac, Isabel, Lothrop, Ludovicus, Ezra, or Eleazer. 

But for his name and Harvard pedigree, but for doing to Harvard what Trump does to residential and commercial real estate, but for Weld Hall and Weld Boathouse, and Weld Hill and Weld Farm, but for carving his name in brick rather than covering it in gold, this Weld—the doyen of losing campaigns for Massachusetts attorney general, 1978; the U.S. Senate, 1996; the New York Republican gubernatorial nomination, 2006; the vice presidency, 2016; and the presidency, forthcoming—this failed CEO of Decker College dares to succeed President Trump by the bullet instead of the ballot.

He hopes to defeat President Mike Pence, I suppose, following the impeachment, conviction, and removal from office of President Trump. A separate criminal trial would, to extrapolate from Weld’s reasoning, convict Trump of espionage. 

Then, after his inauguration as the 47th president of the United States, Weld would (presumably) refuse to pardon or commute Trump’s sentence, resulting in a tie-down team strapping the 45th president to a gurney—in the death house at the United States Penitentiary, Terre Haute—for his execution by lethal injection.

Regarding a final statement, here goes: Bill Weld is meshuggeneh!

About Bill Asher

Bill Asher is a writer and retired executive. He lives with his family in Massachusetts.

Photo: Alex Edelman/AFP/Getty Images

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