A Dose of Clapper Down Under

The National Press Club of Australia recently had the misfortune to be subjected to a raw assessment about the dire state of affairs in America by the former Director of National Intelligence, Mr. James Clapper. Presently, we don’t know if this commences an epidemic of ex-Obama officials touring Van Diemen’s Land in the way that washed up hair bands tour Japan; however, we do know you likely missed this gig and that Clapper’s rash remarks remain unknown to you. In accordance with prudence and Karma, then, as Mr. Clapper might say: “Let’s listen in.”

Mr. Clapper judged President Trump’s interactions with Russia as “very problematic.”

He deemed President Trump’s firing of former FBI Director James Comey “egregious and inexcusable”.

He sniffed that “Watergate pales, really, in my view, compared to what we’re confronting now.”

He informed the assembled Aussies: “Is there a smoking gun with all the smoke? I don’t know the answer to that. I think it’s vital, though, we find that out.” (He did not explain how these assembled Aussies could help him to find something he couldn’t find while serving as America’s DNI.)

Finally, in what amounts to an esteemed layman’s opinion, Mr. Clapper diagnosed President Trump and his associates as suffering from “extreme paranoia” about information impugning his election’s—and, ergo, his presidency’s—legitimacy.

Granted, Mr. Clapper’s remarks were delivered and quoted in the original Australian; nevertheless, let us endeavor to examine them in plain English.

First, taken at face value, Mr. Clapper’s fretting over President Trump’s interactions with Russia as “very problematic” because “the Russians are not our friends” appears benign. Less so is Mr. Clapper’s unique interpretation of heredity: it’s in the Russians’ “genes to be opposed, diametrically opposed, to the United States and western democracies.” Thus, scratching the surface of Mr. Clapper’s analysis, the Russian people’s alleged hereditary allergy to liberty must be a recent genetic mutation. After all, prior to President Trump’s inauguration, Mr. Clapper didn’t find anything problematic with President Obama’s “reset” of relations and promise to be “more flexible” toward Russia. Neither did he appear to have a problem with Hillary Clinton’s approval of selling American uranium to Russia nor with the Clinton Foundation’s subsequent “donations” following her decision and Bill Clinton’s well-compensated speech in Russia.

Secondly, while Mr. Clapper is entitled to his opinion regarding the firing of Mr. Comey, he offered it just days before Mr. Comey was set to testify to the Senate about President Trump’s statements regarding the F.B.I.’s counterintelligence investigation of former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn. Conceivably, as is his wont, Mr. Clapper merely offered a sneak peek at Mr. Comey’s testimony? Yet, one can’t help suspecting Mr. Clapper sought to buttress Mr. Comey’s credibility and, thereby, that of any new “Russia-gate” allegations made. Why? Patience, Grasshopper . . .

Thirdly, though professing his ignorance of an extant “smoking gun,” Mr. Clapper remains ever the optimist and he cheerfully proclaimed “Russia-gate” to be worse than Watergate. Again, while not fluent in Australian, roughly translated Mr. Clapper said: “We don’t know what happened but it’s worse than Watergate.” Thus works the mind of the man whose expertise with intelligence was relied upon to keep you alive. Sweet dreams, folks.

Finally, Mr. Clapper’s diagnosis of President Trump and his associates’ mental health is evaluated in the context of the above. Though not one shred of evidence—let alone a smoking gun—has been produced that President Trump and his campaign colluded with the Russians to influence the outcome of the 2016 election, Democrats and their media cohorts are calling for his impeachment. Ergo, as the saying goes: one cannot be “extremely paranoid” when it’s true that they’re all out to get you. Fortunately for Mr. Clapper, he is not a licensed therapist and cannot be held legally liable for malpractice.

Mr. Clapper, though, is the former DNI (née Booz Allen honcho) who testified under oath to Congress that his NSA wasn’t spying on millions of Americans when, in fact, it was—as revealed by super leaker Edward Snowden (née Booz Allen employee).

Mr. Clapper is the person who, when called on it, argued that “What I said was, the NSA does not voyeuristically pore through U.S. citizens’ emails. I stand by that” (which he did until it was pointed out that in his testimony he’d never mentioned email).

Mr. Clapper is, in fact, the Obama administration official responsible for 5% of the NSA’s Section 702 database violating Americans’ privacy protections; and one of the Obama administration officials the FISA court censured for concealing these violations, which were ruled a “very serious Fourth Amendment issue”—i.e, an abuse of power.

And, yes, Mr. Clapper is the person who uttered this Orwellian nugget: “I responded in what I thought was the most truthful, or least most untruthful manner.”

What, then, can we divine from former DNI Clapper trashing a sitting American President on a foreign shore at the Australian National Press Club?

We learn Mr. Clapper is spreading the scurrilous Russia Collusion allegation against President Trump to distract from the real “bigger than Watergate” governmental abuse of power in which he participated; and the dire constitutional crisis that the Obama administration precipitated: the government’s spying on millions of innocent Americans.

And, with clinical certainty, we know to avoid another dose of Clapper down under.

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16 responses to “A Dose of Clapper Down Under”

    • Q: What is an “Aussie kiss?”
      A: A French kiss “down under”

    • Thanks mate for your open profile as I got to follow you here from your amerika comment and get to read this article. I watched the Clapper at press club on TV here a few days ago and it’s worse than Mr McCotter imagines. What a effing wanker Clapper is. The Obama “drones” and Never Trumpers have infected us for 6 months now ( aussie journalists and state owned leftist ABC TV lap this crap up) and the rare Rep. commentator is straight up labelled a Trump “supporter”. Faded has-been rock bands going to Japan !! Yes please, send them here instead of (your) deep-state drones !!!

  1. I would like members of the Congressional Committee that questioned Comey to ask Clapper why it was that he insisted Comey present the Russian pee dossier to Trump alone, given that it is reportedly unusual for the FBI Director to meet the president alone. Why did Clapper not attend that meeting? Was he avoiding any particular questions?

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    • you heard why he did it
      he didn’t want to embarass mr pussygrabber

      although, the so-called president has shown time and again that he is beyond shame

  2. Clapper clearly colluded with the Clintons who were openly involved with the Russians, thereby, Clapper colluded with the Russians by proxy.
    I’m sure Clapper has invitations to speak at N. Korea, Beijing, Caracas, Tehran, and Havana.
    He should retire at one of these places.

  3. I’m so tired of winning. Hail Hair Twitler the great King Con, Long Live the King, in Russia shirtless on ponies with Putin.

    • A partial list of President Trump’s glorious accomplishments to-date, and the bottom one has your name on it:

      Abortion funding – eliminated internationally, on the chopping block domestically
      Border Wall – under construction
      CAFE standards – going, going, going
      Coal – a friend in the White House, what more does one need
      Countries refusing to take back their criminals – at the lowest level in the past decade
      Dakota Access – pumping oil, now, today, and for many decades to come
      Diseased illegal aliens – bye bye, being deported, don’t go away mad, just go away
      Economic Confidence – at historic highs
      FBI – incompetent Director “fired”, a “law enforcement” officer nominated
      Federal Judges – a slew of conservative Judges nominated, confirmations inevitable
      Guantanamo Bay – open for business and ready for new ‘guests’
      Government – the swamp is being drained, but it’s a big swamp with lots of nasty critters
      Gun control – dying the ugly death it deserves, gun sales climbing
      H1B visas – going, going, going … hire American, buy American
      Industry – bringing their factories back to the US
      Invading hordes of diseased illegal aliens – at the lowest level in 17 years
      Islamic leaders – met with more on his first trip than Obama did in eight years
      Jobs (“real jobs”) – roaring back … Bayer, Carrier, Ford, Hyundai, Sprint/Softbank, etc
      Leakers – one arrested, many more under investigation, including the 6’8” pajama boy
      Military micromanagement – no more leftist prepubescent weenies telling Generals how to wage war
      Muslim terrorists – being denied entry and hunted down
      NAFTA – under renegotiation
      News media – is it Fake News or Very Fake News
      ObamaDeathCare – repealed and replaced in the House, on to the Senate
      Paris Climate Accord – deader than environuts remaining two brain cells
      Red lines in the sand – we don’t need no stinking red lines, we got Tomahawks
      Regulations – two eliminated for every new one added
      Relations with Muslims – the ONLY President to be feted by 50 of the largest Muslim nations
      Religious freedom – ended the America-hating Democrats war on religion
      Sanctuary cities – being defunded, sanctuary supporting politicians likely to be jailed
      SCOTUS – originalist confirmed, three more tee’d up and ready to go
      Taxes – being cut
      TPP – deader than Lying Crooked Hillary’s political future
      Unemployment claims – at the lowest level in decades
      Veterans care – no longer being wait-listed to death, able to see real, outside doctors
      Wookie lunches – gone, gone, gone to the pigs
      XL – approved for construction using American steel

      Democrats and Entitlement Monkeys – in utter disarray and wee-wee’ing themselves daily!!!

      • You ‘misread’ my post, try it again. Also, it’s a well publicized fact that people of your ‘mental acuity’ can frequently improve their reading comprehension when they move their lips while reading, so try that as well. If you’re unsure of the proper amount of lip movement, ask your boyfriend(s) for ‘input’ until you get it right.

        A partial list of President Trump’s glorious accomplishments to-date:

        Abortion funding – eliminated internationally, on the chopping block domestically
        Border Wall – under construction
        CAFE standards – going, going, going
        Coal – a friend in the White House, what more does one need
        Countries refusing to take back their criminals – at the lowest level in the past decade
        Dakota Access – pumping oil, now, today, and for many decades to come
        Diseased illegal aliens – bye bye, being deported, don’t go away mad, just go away
        Economic Confidence – at historic highs
        FBI – incompetent Director “fired”, a “law enforcement” officer nominated
        Federal Judges – a slew of conservative Judges nominated, confirmations inevitable
        Guantanamo Bay – open for business and ready for new ‘guests’
        Government – the swamp is being drained, but it’s a big swamp with lots of nasty critters
        Gun control – dying the ugly death it deserves, gun sales climbing
        H1B visas – going, going, going … hire American, buy American
        Industry – bringing their factories back to the US
        Invading hordes of diseased illegal aliens – at the lowest level in 17 years
        Islamic leaders – met with more on his first trip than Obama did in eight years
        Jobs (“real jobs”) – roaring back … Bayer, Carrier, Ford, Hyundai, Sprint/Softbank, etc
        Leakers – one arrested, many more under investigation, including the 6’8” pajama boy
        Military micromanagement – no more leftist prepubescent weenies telling Generals how to wage war
        Muslim terrorists – being denied entry and hunted down
        NAFTA – under renegotiation
        News media – is it Fake News or Very Fake News
        ObamaDeathCare – repealed and replaced in the House, on to the Senate
        Paris Climate Accord – deader than environuts remaining two brain cells
        Red lines in the sand – we don’t need no stinking red lines, we got Tomahawks
        Regulations – two eliminated for every new one added
        Relations with Muslims – the ONLY President to be feted by 50 of the largest Muslim nations
        Religious freedom – ended the America-hating Democrats war on religion
        Sanctuary cities – being defunded, sanctuary supporting politicians likely to be jailed
        SCOTUS – originalist confirmed, three more tee’d up and ready to go
        Taxes – being cut
        TPP – deader than Lying Crooked Hillary’s political future
        Unemployment claims – at the lowest level in decades
        Veterans care – no longer being wait-listed to death, able to see real, outside doctors
        Wookie lunches – gone, gone, gone to the pigs
        XL – approved for construction using American steel

        Democrats and Entitlement Monkeys – in utter disarray and wee-wee’ing themselves daily!!!

      • Yes, the Great Adored Leader, loved by all. Hail Hair Twitler the greatest one, KING CON leader of the FoxGOPutin. I don’t need to read your BS to Know Your breath probably smells like the stooges in The great leader’s Cabinet. You Know, you needn’t french while kissing up to the fat asshole. Comrade.

      • MORE LIP MOVEMENT!!!

        You ‘misread’ my post, try it again. Also, it’s a well publicized fact that people of your ‘mental acuity’ can frequently improve their reading comprehension when they move their lips while reading, so try that as well. If you’re unsure of the proper amount of lip movement, ask your boyfriend(s) for ‘input’ until you get it right.

        A partial list of President Trump’s glorious accomplishments to-date:

        Abortion funding – eliminated internationally, on the chopping block domestically
        Border Wall – under construction
        CAFE standards – going, going, going
        Coal – a friend in the White House, what more does one need
        Countries refusing to take back their criminals – at the lowest level in the past decade
        Dakota Access – pumping oil, now, today, and for many decades to come
        Diseased illegal aliens – bye bye, being deported, don’t go away mad, just go away
        Economic Confidence – at historic highs
        FBI – incompetent Director “fired”, a “law enforcement” officer nominated
        Federal Judges – a slew of conservative Judges nominated, confirmations inevitable
        Guantanamo Bay – open for business and ready for new ‘guests’
        Government – the swamp is being drained, but it’s a big swamp with lots of nasty critters
        Gun control – dying the ugly death it deserves, gun sales climbing
        H1B visas – going, going, going … hire American, buy American
        Industry – bringing their factories back to the US
        Invading hordes of diseased illegal aliens – at the lowest level in 17 years
        Islamic leaders – met with more on his first trip than Obama did in eight years
        Jobs (“real jobs”) – roaring back … Bayer, Carrier, Ford, Hyundai, Sprint/Softbank, etc
        Leakers – one arrested, many more under investigation, including the 6’8” pajama boy
        Military micromanagement – no more leftist prepubescent weenies telling Generals how to wage war
        Muslim terrorists – being denied entry and hunted down
        NAFTA – under renegotiation
        News media – is it Fake News or Very Fake News
        ObamaDeathCare – repealed and replaced in the House, on to the Senate
        Paris Climate Accord – deader than environuts remaining two brain cells
        Red lines in the sand – we don’t need no stinking red lines, we got Tomahawks
        Regulations – two eliminated for every new one added
        Relations with Muslims – the ONLY President to be feted by 50 of the largest Muslim nations
        Religious freedom – ended the America-hating Democrats war on religion
        Sanctuary cities – being defunded, sanctuary supporting politicians likely to be jailed
        SCOTUS – originalist confirmed, three more tee’d up and ready to go
        Taxes – being cut
        TPP – deader than Lying Crooked Hillary’s political future
        Unemployment claims – at the lowest level in decades
        Veterans care – no longer being wait-listed to death, able to see real, outside doctors
        Wookie lunches – gone, gone, gone to the pigs
        XL – approved for construction using American steel

        Democrats and Entitlement Monkeys – in utter disarray and wee-wee’ing themselves daily!!!

  4. Australians tend to be far more realistic and world-knowledgeable than Americans, so it’s unlikely they caught any of the diseases that James Clapper was spreading.